Going All In: Are Your Feelings Running Your Business?

There are two ingredients of attracting clients on Facebook, and earlier this week we were talking about how important it is to decide on WHO you are talking to in your marketing.

Today I want to address the other part of the secret: GOING ALL IN.

And this is a subject that takes me slightly away from the actual topic around messaging and content creation.

Too many coaches, myself included for a long time, are getting too hooked up on running a “business of their dreams”, which is quite dangerous as it paints the unrealistic business of making less effort and getting incredible results quickly. Things that cancel each other out.

We tend to get too emotionally involved, only wanting to work with perfect people, being accepted and loved by everyone in our audience, not being “bothered” by too many unnecessary messages coming in, not having to spend time overthinking what to post.

We basically do not want to do things in our businesses that we do not “feel like” or that seem somewhat scary, or we get too concerned about others judging us or rejecting us…

And I believe this is made even worse in the coaching industry because there are so many coaches who help with all these issues marketing themselves in our newsfeeds, so in a way, we get really caught up in this narrative, which is pretty destructive for the actual business to establish and blossom.

Honestly, I have been in a push/pull mode for years, and I have to admit, it was a lot to do into buying into the belief that “business should be fun” “business should feel amazing”.

I just read a post from a fellow entrepreneur and coach, Michelle Vroom, that pretty much took the words out of my mouth.

In sharing her views, Michelle likens business to parenting. There are days when it feels like a lot of fun, but there are also days that can be very, VERY frustrating. But you just get on with it.

Michelle has three boys, and I only ever had one “golden child” that never gave me any trouble (or I cannot remember any as it was so long ago.)

BUT I have a brand new puppy entering adolescence here, and there are days that I feel like curling into a foetus position sucking my thumb. It gets THAT exhausting to keep an eye on and entertain him 24/7.

NOTHING gets done. I don’t even remember doing any livestreams in the last 2.5 months since we got him.

But here is the truth, business is NOT here to provide us with joy, rainbows and unicorns. It is a tool that allows a lot of amazing things as an outcome, but discipline and determination will be required.

It starts with a decision.

So many times, I hear coaches saying, “I have no time for marketing”, and I can’t help to think these people are wasting their time trying to build a business because they still seem to have an “employee” mindset. Without realising it, they are trying to “get away” with doing the necessary minimum and still getting paid. They do not put building their business above all. Because this is what often happens when we work for others, right?

Unfortunately, this is not the case in self-employment.

When you don’t do your absolute best, things slow down. The momentum disappears, demotivation and insecurity kick in. There is NO OTHER WAY to succeed in business but to go all-in, especially at the first stages, which, to be frank, can last many years for some.

I once saw a discussion amongst a bunch of very successful coaches about how long it took them to “make it”, and it was so eye-opening for me! Some reported seven years, some five, most said it took three to four years before things became somewhat reliably consistent or they got a big break. Usually because they “figured something out”!

So no, getting to 10K months in 6 weeks and even 12 months is not always possible.

But what is possible is to persevere and try your absolute BEST (whatever that best for you at the time).

To be transparent here, there are periods when your absolute best could be pretty awful in your own evaluation. Still, those are vital times for internal personal growth, which reminds me of a brilliant quote from the first president of Estonia, back in the 90s after they because the first of the socialistic republics leaving the USSR: “ Our situation may be shit, but it’s a fertiliser for the future”.

And this is where in business and especially in its MOST IMPORTANT department — marketing (building relationships with potential and current clients) we need to “get to work”.

No matter what we are feeling at the time because our results will ONLY depend on us, our mistakes, our failures, allowing us to figure out THE way that works.

Getting stuck in, not jumping from one thing to another.

Creating a consistent schedule, blocking off time to dedicate to your business (and making sure EVERYTHING and EVERYONE else is on board and allowing you to take that time without distraction).

Making it happen.



Despite fears and insecurities.

Exploring, discovering and moving forward.

Now, this turned into a motivational post indeed, but I want to give you some simple suggestions that you can implement in your life so your marketing gets prioritised. You can honestly give it your best, so someday your business becomes that kind of business that gives you more flexibility and more freedom.

Make a list of non-negotiable activities.

There is always something that you CAN do no matter how busy you are.

  • It may be going live for just 5 minutes every day.
  • Or spending 20–30 minutes on writing long-form posts
  • Or writing a long-form post one day and the next day going live or recording a video talking about the same subject.

We do not need to be unique every time we create a piece of content. In fact, the more we repeat the most important concepts that link our readers to what we actually do in our businesses, the more clients we generate. This social media world is too noisy to say something once and hope people will hear.

It is all about BEING THERE in front of the audience and saying the right things for the right people (this is what I speak about a lot, this is what I help create inside my Content To Leads intensive, this is HOW we attract clients with our posts and videos.)

Even with my puppy turning my world upside down, I have been writing long-form content almost every single day (and posting something shorter and fun when it was absolutely impossible.) And although going live and especially running my Show Up! Stand Out! interviews have always been my “thing” — I had to park these activities for a bit to get reorganised.

Meanwhile, I developed an effective program around messaging (Content To Leads) that I have been working with clients on in the last three months, and my long-form posts were able to support and illustrate the kind of content I help create.

Staying visible consistently kick-started a very steady lead generation for the new program, even though I sometimes felt like my business was falling apart just like my life was.

Only it wasn’t AT ALL.

I actually managed to narrow it down to find something extraordinary, and now I have an excellent direction that is starting to feel genuinely GREAT. And this brings me back to expecting our business to feel good and in the flow all the time.

The business has no emotions. It is just something we do to open up better opportunities, whatever it looks for each one of us.

But in itself, the business part is just technical: do what needs doing.

It is different from choosing the direction of what you want to help people with, and we, coaches, tend to mix these two things too much. And when we do, we are on very dangerous grounds because we stop doing what needs to be done. After all, it “doesn’t feel good”.

The secret to attracting clients on Facebook is to put your business hat on. Especially when it comes to daily activities that it involves:

  • creating content,
  • engaging with other users,
  • sending friend requests to people who fit your targeting criteria,
  • following up on enquiries,
  • replying timely to messages in Messenger, including checking message requests at least once a day.

And committing to it. Fully. Like your life depends on it.

Because the life you want really does.

My question to you is, are you wearing your business hat consistently?




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